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Shut up and take my money: “Kung Fury” brings martial arts, vikings and Hitler together at last

kungfury7

For many, the ’80s was a decade of the best fashion, movies, and music known to humanity. For the rest of us, it was a painful embarrassment that we’re still trying to forget by drinking heavily.

Still, we’d be lying if we said there wasn’t something magical and stupidly fun about the cinema and games of that decadent decade. Which might explain the recent resurgence in ’80s-centric media like the critically acclaimed Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon and, now, the too-insane-to-actually-get-made-but-totally-will movie Kung Fury!

▼”Laser Unicorns?” Yep. Laser Unicorns.

Yes, that’s right: Kung Fury. If you’re wondering why you haven’t heard of it or seen TV commercials for this retro film, it’s because the whole project is currently seeking funding on Kickstarter.

▼And has more explosions than a Chilli-Bean-and-Zippo festival!

While we can’t imagine any major studio taking a chance on a concept this absurd (kung fu cop goes back in time to fight kung fu Hitler but accidentally goes too far back and meets a viking warrior woman and freaking Thor and then goes back to the future to fight the Kung Führer), it does seems tailor-made for the Internet. There are more WTF and “I don’t even…” moments per second during the two-minute trailer than a full afternoon spent browsing 4chan.

▼The umlaut means it’s serious.

▼Honestly, this makes as much sense as any other time travel movie.

▼Riiiiiiiiiiiicolaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

And before you feel let down knowing that this is but a mere trailer, we have some excellent news for you! The project has surpassed US$400,000 in funding, meaning that what was originally going to be a 30-minute short film has now transformed into a feature-length film! And with funding open for another 19 days, it’s just possible that the movie will become even funkier still.

▼Yeah, we’d like to see Stallone top this!

In case you haven’t seen the trailer yet, watch it below. And then go throw your money at the creator. All of your money!!!

Hold up, was that a T. Rex!? That couldn’t have been a T. Rex. Was it a T. Rex? Let’s rewind and check.

▼Yep. That was a T. Rex.

Seriously, I don’t even…

You know what? Just shut up and take my damn money! NOW!!!

Source: Kickstarter
Images: YouTube

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