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Five complaints Ukrainian women have about dating Japanese men

Krista Rogers Jan 30, 2014
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Nataliya News is a column brought to you by our Ukrainian correspondent Nataliya, who currently lives there and writes her reports for our sister site RocketNews24 Japan in her charming Japanese. This week, she airs the feelings of her fellow Ukrainian women about dating or being married to Japanese guys, which of course we’ve translated into English for you! Check it out after the jump.

Hi everyone! Dóbryj dén [Добрий день] (Ukrainian for “hello”). I came back from a trip to Japan one week ago. During my stay, I met three of my Ukrainian women friends whom I haven’t seen in five years! Two of them are now married to Japanese men, and the third one is dating a Japanese man. It was fun to catch up with each other about a lot of stuff. One of the interesting topics that we discussed was “What is dating a Japanese man like?!” Of course, they had mostly good things to say but also came up with a list of five complaints about dating Japanese men. I think you’ll all find their list amusing, so I wanted to share their thoughts with you.

“We’re happy we married Japanese men!”

All three of them have no regrets about dating Japanese men. They said that they’re very happy, in fact. However, every now and then they have some complaints. Here are five things that Ukrainian women are dissatisfied with about dating Japanese men.

Complaint #1: “He doesn’t show his real feelings in front of others much”

When couples go out in Ukraine, it’s normal for them to hold hands and kiss in public. When they’re eating at a restaurant, they often cozy up to each other. Anyone could tell at a glance that they’re dating. They act the same in front of friends or family. But Japan is a different story. From a Ukrainian girl’s perspective, Japanese guys can sometimes come off as cold in front of others. They don’t show their feelings for their girlfriends in front of family or friends. Ukrainians girls aren’t used to this lack of affection, so they may mistakenly think that the guy doesn’t like them.

Complaint #2: “He only calls me once a week?! You’ve gotta be kidding!”

For women in a relationship with Japanese men, their biggest complaint has got to be the fact that their boyfriends only call them once per week. Ukrainian people would be really surprised to hear that, since couples who are dating in Ukraine call each other at least three times per day! So if you want to date a Ukrainian girl, make sure to call her a lot!

Complaint #3: “He’s not a gentleman. At all!”

All three of my friends agreed that the concept of “ladies first” doesn’t seem to exist in Japan. Their husbands/boyfriend don’t act as the perfect gentlemen they’d hope for when exiting taxis or leaving restaurants. My friends wish they could change this trait about Japanese guys.

Complaint #4: “I want lots of flowers!”

One of my friends who is married to a Japanese man said that she thought about divorcing her husband only five months after their marriage! The reason? Flowers. She didn’t receive flowers from him on her birthday, or on Valentine’s Day. She even waited patiently until March 8, which is International Women’s Day, but exploded when she still didn’t get any flowers! In Ukraine, men always give flowers or pretty bouquets to women on dates, their birthdays, or even just ordinary days. Beware, guys!

Complaint #5: “My husband works too much”

My married friends commented about how their husbands always leave for work early in the morning and don’t get back until late at night, so they and their children don’t get to see each other much. Sometimes the men even work on Saturdays. It’s also really hard for them to take long vacations, so going on trips out of the country is out of the question. If you were to ask a Ukrainian,”What’s your image of Japanese people?” the first thing they would say is that Japanese people are workaholics. Ukrainians usually work from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. and have Saturdays and Sundays off. They can take about two weeks off per year, and many people spend this time with their families or traveling abroad.