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Master Blaster

Writer / Translator

Master Blaster is the two-man translating team of Canada’s Steven Le Blanc and Japan’s Masami M, a pair who in addition to writing work are in English education and created the StudyNow app for Japanese students of English.

Together they have written somewhere around 1,500 articles for RocketNews24 covering such diverse topics as Chinese men selling sanitary napkins to each other and a Japanese guy dragging an ear of corn around the Tokyo train system. A few of these were actually good, but don’t take our word for it! Here’s what our beloved readers had to say:

“One isn't always in the mood for bold tastes. But when I'm in the mood for bold flavor I turn to you.”
“Stupid article. Who cares what the Japanese think it's cool. You don't call a monkey, "gorilla".”
“You know, this is about the most cogent explanation of how a turbocharger works that I have ever seen in the non-motorsports world.”
“Thanks for the article peter!”
“It's people like you who make exploitation possible.”
“It looks yummy and the story was great. Thank you for the smile.”

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Posted by Master Blaster (Page 166)

We give Mr. Sato a Gyro Bowl: Can it withstand even his creepiest undulations?

We give Mr. Sato a Gyro Bowl: Can it withstand even his creepiest undulations?

It’s a little known yet unsurprising fact that Mr. Sato loves a nice bowl of potato chips. However, much to the chagrin of his colleagues, he loves them so much that he begins to flail his limbs around wildly when he gets some.

After brushing the crumbs off the keyboards and shopping around online, the rest of the RocketNews24 staff found Gyro Bowl. For only 2,480 yen (US$24) this German-engineered bowl boasts a full 360° of spill prevention. All that combined with Mr. Sato’s inherent love of orange spinny stuff made this purchase a no-brainer. When the bowl arrived it was time to fire up the cameras and see how Gyro Bowl held up to Mr. Sato’s chip dance of joy.

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When it comes to blending art and sport, Japanese athletes represent

When it comes to blending art and sport, Japanese athletes represent

Japan has fared pretty well in the realm of professional sports these days with more and more Nippon Professional Baseball players popping up in the Major League and the recent rise in men’s and women’s soccer.

Even on the streets young Japanese people are pushing their bodies to the limit and creating awe inspiring athletic dance routines and working their way onto the world stage. The following are four such people, Taisuke Nonaka (B-boying), Yohei Uchino (flatland BMX), Kotaru Tokuda (freestyle football), and ZiNEZ (freestyle basketball).

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Japanese university seating plan meme submitted to web for approval

The internet is a vast ocean of small infographics, flow charts, and images with the aim to succinctly present the truths of life to the masses. However, not every clever doodle is worth being held in our hard drives to be pulled out during a relevant discussion later on. These images sink into the deep abyss of the internet ocean, only to be found when James Cameron finally gets a good enough sub.

Let’s watch as one humble netizen submits their typical Japanese university seating arrangement to others. Will the chart hit home with other students, or will it fall flat? First let’s look at an English translation of it.

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Shinjo City shares its love with anti-smoking poster

Although, Japan is still something of a smoker’s paradise compared to other developed countries, there are signs that times are a’changing with an increase in prices and no-smoking areas sprouting up across the land.

Anti-smoking groups often use dramatic stories and images to try and frighten or disgust people out of smoking tobacco. However, one simple poster hanging in a smoking section in Shinjo City, Yamagata Prefecture sends a chilling message of love to all their nicotine addicts.

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Just when you thought fried panda cakes couldn’t get any cuter: Strawberry milk fried panda cakes

What could be cuter than a fluffy, rolly-polly panda? A panda full of gooey strawberry-milk flavored cream of course. That’s just what Ginza Cozy Corner is cooking up at their L’Ueno shop this month.

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We play Russian roulette with new spicy “Tyrant Habanero” snacks

Russian roulette is the ultimate in high-stakes games of chance. A revolver with five empty chambers and one loaded, there is no more intense or insane way to spend a Saturday night. However, since none of our minds were warped from being a POW in the Vietnam War we haven’t had the pleasure of partaking in such a game.

But now, we might enjoy the culinary version with Tohato’s Russian Tyrant Habanero snack cups. The premise is that one out of every six corn chips in the cup is seasoned with enough habanero spice to take your face off. In the interests of science and comedy, we wrangled our weakest-tongued reporter to try some out and see if it truly is the rush its makers describe.

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Fan makes detailed clay figure of Hayao Miyazaki, even his cigarettes look life-like

Hayao Miyazaki has created some of anime’s more memorable characters, winning legions of fans all around the world. As such you would imagine that along with the thousands of pieces of fan art, an aspiring sculptor somewhere would pick up the gauntlet and recreate some of them in three dimensions.

One sculptor answered that call, and set out to make the ultimate Ghibli character from clay: Mr. Miyazaki himself… We hear his friends say he’s “a real character.”

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We try mail order chanko stew from a swanky restaurant

Chanko stew is a very heavy dish that most people associate with sumo wrestlers. The high protein and high caloric content of these pots are perfect for putting on the bulk or just to warm your bones on a cold winter’s day. Chanko is also known to be rather pricey due to the bounty of ingredients used. That’s why most people would probably steer clear of Chankoya Suzukichan and its reputation as “a restaurant frequented by celebrities” for fear of breaking the bank.

But now, thanks to (oddly enough) the convenience store Family Mart’s online shopping site, we could get a taste of the high-life delivered straight to our door. So we did.

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Connect to sushi-poo Wi-Fi using smartphone or tablet devices

Looking for a way to give those in your immediate area looking for Wi-Fi a delicious treat? No? Well, me neither. But I do enjoy some pointless yet fun tricks to do with devices like Apple’s iPhone or iPad. Take, for example, this incredibly easy way to make your device show up on others as pieces of sushi and poo – or more!

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Man arrested for fraud in potentially the stupidest way possible

For years now, Japan has been beset by cases of ore ore sagi (“hey-it’s-me” scam). This is where the scammer contacts a (usually elderly) person claiming to be or know their child or relative. They then explain that they need money for an emergency and provide an account for the victim to transfer their money to, which sadly they often do.

These perpetrators can be difficult to catch, but sometimes a person’s force of habit can help make the police’s job that much easier. Take the case of one suspect named Akio Kanazawa, for example.

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This week in convenience store bento: Our top 5 new releases

Tuesday is known as New Bento Day at major convenience stores across Japan. As we’ve highlighted before, convenience stores in the country put a lot of effort into their ready-to-eat creations. What’s more is they cycle through new flavors on a weekly basis. This can be a double-edged sword as your favorite dish can disappear tragically fast, but you can also count on something equally good coming along as well.

As regular consumers of convenience store bento, the editorial department of RocketNews24 Japan has come together and ranked the top 5 new additions to 7-Eleven, Lawson, and Family Mart for the week of 14 January, 2014. Please refer to it for your own convenient dining pleasure.

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From children to netizens: Asian international relations have a long way to go

We here at RocketNews24 occasionally get hit with accusations of having an anti-China or anti-Korea slant. And while we don’t think a story about a young Chinese man getting a seatless bicycle wedged in his butt is inherently anti-Chinese, we can see how it might be interpreted that way. We can also see how we get labeled as anti-other-Asian-countries since we largely get our information from Japanese sources, and it would be naive to say there aren’t anti-Chinese and anti-Korean forces at play within the Japanese media. You couldn’t hope for a better example than the following story that was said to have been posted by a Chinese person on a message board. The anecdote has a lot to say about how Chinese children are raised to view Japan. However, the reaction to the story itself is more revealing about what it’s like on the other side.

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Love hotels offer free post-coital kimono dressing service for guests on Coming of Age Day

As we saw earlier today, some girls in Japan celebrate turning the big two-oh with some rather elaborate outfits. However, most young women on Coming-of-Age Day in Japan opt for a more traditional-looking kimono.

Another aspect of Coming-of-Age Day is the ceremony held in each region of the land. In each of them, large numbers of young men and women gather to celebrate, during which time it’s only natural for at least some of them to hook up, which is perhaps why the love hotel industry sees an annual spike on this particular holiday.

If you put these two things together, though, you have a big problem.

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Surprising foreign words Japanese people are likely to know

As mentioned many times before on this site, the modern Japanese language uses a set of characters to represent foreign words called katakana. Such characters are used for foreign place names such a Beverly Hills (ビバリーヒルズ) or people like Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (マフムード・アフマディーネジャード).

However, this feature of Japanese has been criticized by some for allowing the purity of the language to be polluted by foreign influences. It can also cause confusion by creating English words that have different meanings than the original.

That being said, for foreigners visiting Japan with a limited knowledge of the language this list may prove invaluable. Excluding the obvious classics like “OK” (オケ) and “McDonald’s” (マクドナルド) here are some relatively newer loan words ranked by understandability in Japanese.

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Young woman celebrates adulthood with dizzying Hello Kitty/My Melody nails

This 13 January marked yet another Coming-of-Age Day in Japan. Every year on the second Monday of January, young adults who have turned 20 in the previous year congregate in city halls and community centers across the land.

These ceremonies honor the passage into adulthood and for such a once in a lifetime event, it’s not uncommon to see young women dress to the nines with an elegant kimono and elaborate hairstyle. Nails are an important feature too, but one young woman decided to accompany the event with some once-in-a-lifetime nails. In fact the image above is only about 45% of them.

Get ready to see the full picture, but beware! It’s kind of like staring into an Escher painting.

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Give your loved ones stag beetle larvae and more this Valentine’s

On 10 January, confectionery dealer Komatsuya in Akita Prefecture is taking reservations for their annual Valentine’s Stag Beetle Larva Chocolates. As a perennially popular gift of the season for their highly detailed resemblance to actual immature insects, you can bet they’re going to sell fast. But fear not! There’s a whole line-up of insect related good to let that special someone know how you really feel.

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Korean soldier convicted for washing gun in the laundry

Last November, a man enlisted in the Republic of Korea Armed Forces was serving his final day before he was scheduled to be discharged. He just had one last order: clean his personal combat equipment – including his firearm – for inspection.

Apparently feeling burdened with this final duty, he must have been looking for a quick fix when – perhaps thinking “Why not kill two birds with one stone?” – he decided to wash his gun in with the laundry. What could possibly go wrong?

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Instant boyfriend and girlfriend curry pouches now on sale, shopkeepers “worried”

Strolling up and down the aisles of any supermarket in Japan, you are bound to come across several items in sealed vinyl retort pouches. Retort pasta sauce, retort rice porridge, and retort cat food can all be found freshly sealed and ready for quick heating if needed.

Now, all the hassle of landing a boyfriend or girlfriend has been removed, thanks to Retort Boyfriend (Retoruto Kareshi) and Retort Girlfriend (Retoruto Kanojo). Sounds great, but the new product has caused some, like the manager of the Village Vanguard shop pictured above, to become “worried about the future of Japan.”

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Watch the “world’s largest firework” go off 【Video】

That bad boy pictured above is the Yonshakudama (Four Shaku Ball) and it claims to be largest single firework in the world. At a pot-smoker pleasing weight of 420kg (926lbs) and with a diameter of 1.2m (4 feet), most people tend to take the maker’s word for it.

Fireworks of this immense size are launched during a show at the Katakai Festival in Ojiya, Niigata Prefecture and are said to have a beautiful blast radius of 800m (2,625 feet). But enough talk. Let’s kick the tires and light some fires watching them in action thanks to a video uploaded to YouTube by Temple Fireworks.

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Town offers “Mayor for a Day” with tax payment of over one million yen, benefits include sake, pickles

Starting this year, the town of Mamurogawa in Yamagata Prefecture is offering up their mayor’s office for those generous enough to hand over one million yen (US$9,600) in furusato tax (hometown tax). It’s the latest move in an increasing trend of offering premiums for tax revenue in rural areas struggling with decreasing populations.

Offering something in exchange for taxes seems like an odd concept without knowing what furusato tax is, so let start with that. Don’t worry it’s simple.

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