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Master Blaster

Writer / Translator

Master Blaster is the two-man translating team of Canada’s Steven Le Blanc and Japan’s Masami M, a pair who in addition to writing work are in English education and created the StudyNow app for Japanese students of English.

Together they have written somewhere around 1,500 articles for RocketNews24 covering such diverse topics as Chinese men selling sanitary napkins to each other and a Japanese guy dragging an ear of corn around the Tokyo train system. A few of these were actually good, but don’t take our word for it! Here’s what our beloved readers had to say:

“One isn't always in the mood for bold tastes. But when I'm in the mood for bold flavor I turn to you.”
“Stupid article. Who cares what the Japanese think it's cool. You don't call a monkey, "gorilla".”
“You know, this is about the most cogent explanation of how a turbocharger works that I have ever seen in the non-motorsports world.”
“Thanks for the article peter!”
“It's people like you who make exploitation possible.”
“It looks yummy and the story was great. Thank you for the smile.”

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Posted by Master Blaster (Page 184)

Through the Predictability of Television Watch a Girl Seamlessly Age Four Years in 30 Seconds!

Through the Predictability of Television Watch a Girl Seamlessly Age Four Years in 30 Seconds!

Cooking Idol Ai! Mai! Main! was a beloved weekday children’s program that combined anime and live action to entertain and educate children about cooking and nutrition. Its star, Haruka Fukuhara, played the lead role of Main-chan and for the show’s four-year run stood as a paragon of kawaii (cute) on Japanese TV.

However, as of 29 March Cooking Idol Ai! Mai! Main! was taken off the air much to the dismay of thousands of fans. One fan responded to this by uploading a pseudo time-lapse 30-second video to YouTube showing Ms. Fukuhara age from 10 years old in 2009 to the 14-year-old she is now.

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Russian Scientist Predicts “Massive Earthquake” to Hit Japan by End of 2014

Russian Scientist Predicts “Massive Earthquake” to Hit Japan by End of 2014

During the European Geosciences Union (EGU) Convention in Vienna on 9 April, a Russian scientist declared that Japan would face a giant earthquake of magnitude 9.0 within the next year and a half.

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Seoul’s Stunning Sky-High Urinals

South Korea has come a long way in toilet maintenance and design to the forefront of the world. With several cites boasting pristine public washrooms and at least one city offering tours of their facilities, potties are no joke here.

One highlight of South Korean toilet related beauty is the men’s room of N Seoul Tower atop Namsan Mountain in Seoul.

Built hundreds of meters above ground, these urinals are the perfect place for an acrophobe to confront their fears and keep a clean pair of pants. For the rest of us they offer a spectacular view while you take care of business.

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We Visit the 2013 Kanamara Festival and Bring You a Slideshow as Long as… You Know

On the first Sunday of April in Kawasaki City, Kanagawa Prefecture, the Kanayama Shrine holds a festival known casually as the “Penis Festival” on account of its huge array of multi-colored members.

Known as one of Japan’s oddest festivals, the Kanamara Festival draws huge throbbing crowds from around the world. We sent a reporter to this year’s festival for a glans-on experience. The following is her report, along with more photos and videos than you could shake a wang at.

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Chinese Motorists Undergoing Extreme Lucky Streak

Recently in China motorists have been walking away from accidents which would normally prove fatal. In the following two videos we will see a person riding a scooter get broadsided by a car and a huge pole crash through the windshield and into the driver’s seat of a bus. In each incidence of freakish luck both drivers appear visibly shaken neither looked seriously injured.

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Mr. Sato Takes on the “Mammoth 2kg Fried Chicken Curry”

Super-sized menus have been steadily on the rise in Japan, and one place in Akihabara, Tokyo has upped the ante further. On top of their original 1kg dish, Mammoth Curry has released a 2kg monstrosity of chicken, rice and sauce.

Fresh from the beauty salon, RocketNews 24 Curry Eating Classic runner-up Mr. Sato looks for redemption and has some advice for other 2 kilo curry challengers.

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We Try Beer Made with Coffee from an Elephant’s Butt!

Readers may recall Kanagawa based brewery Sankt Gallen from their Valentine’s Day Chocolate Beer and Chocolate Glass promotion. Well, they were back to ring in April Fools’ Day with a coffee stout made using ingredients plucked fresh from an elephant’s anus.

The beer was only available in Japan and sold out in minutes. Luckily, we were able to get our hands on some and try it out. Actually, Mr. Sato tried it out. We just watched with a bucket.

Here’s his full report.

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Newly Opened Café/Bar Shuminova Offers Mini 4WD Races and Nintendo with Your Chicken and Whiskey

Opened on 3 April, Shuminova is a new kind of drinking and eating establishment. It’s named is derived from the Japanese word shumi which means hobby, and the nova refers to the explosion of nostalgia for middle-aged men contained within.

Among the guitars, laptops and game consoles are the main attraction of Shuminova: Tamiya Mini 4WD’s. You can enjoy some tasty food and drink while tinkering with your own customizable car utilizing advice from the owner, a Mini 4WD expert.

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Mr. Sato Goes Glam, Like Some Cat from Japan

Although David Bowie is known around the world, he has a special group of fans in Japan as noted by last month’s David Bowie Café to celebrate his newest album in 10 years, The Next Day.

Among these fans is our very own Mr. Sato. The lovable reporter has always looked up to David Bowie, and one day recently slammed his fist down on the table as hard as he could proclaiming; “That does it! I’ve waited too long and am going to make myself look like Ziggy Stardust once and for all!” He then ran out the office to find a beauty salon.

No one in the editorial department actually noticed him though. Someone thought they had heard a small dog barking in the distance around the same time.

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Burger King’s Controversial Anime Viewing Burger: Rip-Off or Work of Art?

Word has been swirling in the weeks leading up to the release of Burger King’s “anime viewing hamburger” which, as its name suggests, is a burger designed to be enjoyed while watching anime. Watching anime certainly would be an ideal snacking time, so the concept seems solid, but how is it really?

Our fast food specialist Kuzo went to investigate. Here is his report.

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Young Man Beats the Hell out of Demon Mode Taiko No Tatsujin, Possibly Some Onlookers as Well

Walk into any amusement center with video game cabinets and you’re bound to run into a Taiko No Tatsujin machine, almost always with people young and old whacking away at it.

It’s a taiko (traditional Japanese drum) simulator rhythm game where you play J-Pop, classical or video game theme songs in the medium of taiko by hitting the drum in time with the various symbols that scroll by.

But for one guy playing at the Oni (demon) level of difficulty, it’s a brutal yet beautiful assault on the drums leaving spectators dazzled as they watched from a safe distance of about three meters.

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Spy on North Korea for Only 32 Cents!

The city of Dandong lies on the border of China and North Korea separated by the 900-meter wide Yalu River. Taking the China-North Korea Friendship Bridge would take you right into Sinuiju, North Korea, if you have the right permission.

However, word has it that there’s a place upstream of the Yalu where it is only three or four meters across. The place is known as Yibu Kua (“a step across”) due to the fact that one could easily step into the other country by walking across the stones in the river.  RocketNews24‘s Kuzo went to check it out.

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Japanese Man Charged with Poisoning Co-Worker’s Shoe

Imagine the horror of having your toes suddenly start to die and need amputation for seemingly no reason. Then imagine it turned out to be the result of a colleague attempting to kill you.

This bizarre situation has been reality for one unnamed woman in Yamanashi Prefecture for the past four months. A fellow employee, 40-year-old Tatsujiro Fukuzawa, was arrested on suspicion of attempted murder on 28 March.

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Bank Vault for Rent in Tokyo, Perfect for Aspiring Robbers

We’ve all seen bank vaults in movies and on TV. But when you think about it, there aren’t many people in the world who have actually used or gone into the real thing.

As luck would have it a chance to rent your very own bank vault has popped up as a listing on the Real Tokyo Estate website.

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Multifunctional iPhone Powered Smart Stuffed Domo-kun to be Released

Japan is to mascots what Broadway is to theatre or what France is to bicycle racing, and in Japan the Phantom of the Opera or [*name removed*] of mascots has got to be Domo-kun (simply “Domo” in other countries).

From his humble beginnings as a mascot for Japan’s national broadcaster he has achieved international notoriety and an ever expanding line of merchandise. Now, iPhone holding Domo fans may rejoice with the upcoming release of the cute and useful “iPhone Supported Smart Stuffed Toy: iDomo-kun.”

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Is 800 Million Yen Really Enough to Take a Bath In?

Not too long ago, Mr. Sato was thumbing through a magazine when he came across an ad for something. On the page he could see a man sitting in a bath tub filled with cash.  “Boy, he sure looks happy” Mr. Sato thought as he put down the magazine.

That image lingered in the back of his mind until the announcement of Loto 7’s biggest jackpot ever, 800 million yen (US$8.5M). Then it dawned on him. He could win the grand prize and realize his new dream of bathing in money.

“Winning the jackpot once should be no problem,” he thought to himself “but it’d be a little harder to win twice if I need that much to fill a tub.”

He had to be sure that 800 million yen was enough before he’d be foolish enough to play the lottery.

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New Line of Coffee Claims to Shed Fat in 12 Weeks

Kao Japan is preparing to release the newest addition to their line of Healthya brand health drinks. In addition to their existing collection of waters and teas, things are getting a little more flavorful with fat-burning “Healthya Coffee.”

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The Five Most Popular Places to Kill Oneself or The Top Five Places to Save a Life

Japan often gets a reputation as a suicide-heavy nation but the social problem of self-destruction is something all parts of the world have to tackle.

The following is a list of five places in the world where suicides have most often occurred. It’s a bittersweet honor in that they are all either places of extreme natural beauty of impressive feats of engineering.

On the other hand, they are also places and countries that clearly do too little to prevent either the mental illness that leads to suicide of the act itself.

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How a Train Delay Led to a Blind Lady Getting Yelled At: A Cautionary Tale for the Transportation Industry

You would think any transportation business would realize that in the event of a massive delay, a steady flow of information to the passengers is crucial.

Still, places like Kunming Changshui International Airport in China and more recently Keihan Electric Railway in Japan continue to leave their customers stranded without a clue about what’s happening with disastrous results.

On 24 March, Keihan Electric Railway experienced a massive loss of power along the entire Main Line running between Osaka and Kyoto. The hour-and-a-half delay ruined many people’s days and resulted in a tongue lashing for one blind lady.

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